1 You are experiencing the ‘Glasto-scenes-that-haunt-your-dreams’ syndrome.
2 You take pride in your sunburn.
3 The mere thought of cutting off your Glasto wristband sends shivers down your spine.
4 The Glastonbury BBC iPlayer has become your new best friend.
5 This is basically your reaction to the first sip of the day, it being not a warm cider:
6 Going to the moon seems like nothing compared to going back to work again.
7 Your mates on Facebook, Instagram, X and Bluesky all hate you. No, trust us, they do.
8 You smiled at a total stranger on the tube channelling that “Glastonbury Spirit” and it almost got you arrested.
9 When you come back to civilisation and spot another human who is also still rocking the Glasto wristband:
10 You still hold your breath for as long as you can while entering the toilet (even though there’s no need to).
11 Your mates are all hyped for the weekend night out and invite you to come along, but you decline — reason being, it does not look like this:
12 All food is dull and tasteless and not served in a Kraft tray or wrapped in a napkin, which you now consider to be the standard.
13 You look at the Glasto countdown timer for next year’s Glastonbury…
… and break into tears just to realise that next year is a FALLOW YEAR and there are MORE THAN 700 (!) days to go — Now, you start shaking too.
